Goldmine Marketing

Here’s what I’m up to…

  • Howler monkeys in Minnesota?

    10:51am
    Saint Paul

    Skreeeeek!

    “That’s a howler monkey,” I said.

    “Dad.”

    Last night, my son and I pitched a tent and camped in the backyard.

    “And that growl? I think that’s a wolf.”

    (more…)

  • Hooking your audience with Stories

    12:17pm
    Minneapolis, Minnesota

    She slams down my Big Mac with more anger than most cashiers.

    “Nobody has spoken that language in thousands of years,” she says.

    My eyes pop. I didn’t think this was possible. Not anymore. Not in 2023.

    The cashier follows me to my booth.

    “How did you do that.”

    (more…)

  • 109.5 on your FM Dial: “The Ghost”

    2:44pm Thursday
    Saint Paul

    Yesterday I wrote about the muffled radio I could hear at midnight…

    which was no where to be found.

    I was telling my kids about it. My wife chimed in:

    “Oh, I heard it too!”

    (more…)

  • Mystery Radio STEALS Energy

    3:!7pm
    Saint Paul

    I slept in today.

    Just a little, like 15 minutes past my usual.

    Because I was up late, hearing voices and music in my house like a muffled radio somewhere.

    It wasn’t coming from the basement bathroom radio.

    It wasn’t coming from the living room hi-fi.

    It wasn’t coming from outside.

    In fact, I couldn’t find it anywhere.

    (more…)

  • Did I just meet Bruce flippin’ Barton on LinkedIn?

    1:27pm
    Saint Paul

    Last week I sat—virtually—with a few dozen other copywriters in a webinar about Financial Copywriting.

    If you don’t know, Financial is one of the “Big Three” markets. The other two are Health and Relationships.

    This webinar, no doubt, was filled with good advice on writing for companies that sell financial “get rich this week!” type info.

    And those promotions generally do well. Because most everyone wants to get rich.

    Including the webinar attendees… including me… who were promised that the financial info companies were all in desperate need for copywriters.

    “If you can write an email like this one,” said the guest, showing a simple, 5-line message, “then you too can earn big royalties!”

    (more…)

  • Model Collapse: When AI feeds on its own filth

    2:05pm
    Saint Paul

    In a Newsweek article from 1995, computer engineer Clifford Stoll predicted the Internet would be dead within a year.

    Boy was he wrong!

    Stoll couldn’t foresee the tech advancements that have since transformed… well, everything.

    But Stoll did get this part right:

    (more…)

  • The Secret of the “Secret of the One-Legged Golfer” Headline

    10:19am
    Hastings Minn

    Golf!

    I’m out to hit the links in about an hour.

    First time this season, which is a shame—the weather’s been perfect and I’ve missed a lot of great opportunities.

    No worries. I’m not a good golfer anyway.

    Hey are you familiar with John Carlton’s headline:

    “The Secret of the One Legged Golfer”

    (more…)

  • ChatGPT: rate my copy! (Update to Death Squeal story…)

    11:29am
    Saint Paul

    Do you know of John Forde? He’s a direct response copywriter and author, including co-author of “Great Leads.”

    Today John emailed a ChatGPT prompt to direct the AI tool to rate your copy on the four U’s: Urgency, Uniqueness, Usefulness, and Ultra-specificity.

    (I’ve added a 5th U: YOU, the reader—make sure your copy addresses your reader! Anyways…)

    (more…)

  • Three hypnotic phrases I’m trying out tonight

    3:23pm
    Saint Paul

    Tonight’s the school carnival.

    You’ll find me working at the Can Crush booth along Game Row.

    My goal for tonight?

    I chose three cards from my Hypnotic Language card deck. Tonight I’ll be using these phrases as often as I can, if only to see how I can squeeze them into the conversation with elementary school kids:

    (more…)

  • What works… when words won’t?

    3:37pm
    Saint Paul

    Our ancient Kenmore clothes drier is no longer moaning in agony.

    Now it’s got a full-on death squeal.

    (more…)